Essential English by Harold Evans

Author:Harold Evans
Language: eng
Format: mobi
Publisher: CCV Digital
Published: 2010-10-29T23:00:00+00:00

2. Mr Benn, Minister of Technology, has written to atomic scientists working at Dounreay, Caithness, and Risley, Lancashire, warning them of an American plot to discover the secrets of Britain’s latest reactor, the fast-breeder reactor at Dounreay, by persuading the senior scientists working on the project to join the Brain Drain.

This intro has tried to indicate the two news points of the appeal to scientists and the attack on an American company but it loses the reader in the particulars. It is 50 words long. It is also going further than strict accuracy would permit in the word ‘plot’: this was not used by the minister.

No other daily attempted to indicate these two news points in one sentence. Three of the other dailies chose to concentrate the intro sentence on the news point of the minister’s appeal to scientists; two concentrated on his attack on the American company. Here are the intros, with comments:

Intros angled on the minister’s appeal

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